Love is a Staring Contest
by RunwithscissorsXXXbattlescars
Summary: When Fuyuki off-handedly tells Momoka that people fall in love when they stare into each other's eyes, she is determined to make him hers—through a staring contest! But what will happen when the others hear this rumor? Various pairings included.


**Yeah. This idea was completely random and has nothing to do with anything. I wrote it for fun. Various pairings are included; as to which those are, you'll see soon enough...~**

**I don't own Keroro Gunso. If I did, then something like this would happen:**

* * *

The day was warm, the sun was bright, the trees were in full bloom, and Momoka Nishizawa was walking home in bliss. Fuyuki was there by her side, spacing out, as it seemed, but that didn't really matter to her. She blushed and walked a little closer to him. He didn't even notice.

Fuyuki hummed and looked to the trees by the sidewalk. He appeared to have something on his mind.

"What's the matter, Fuyuki-kun?" asked Momoka, "accidentally" brushing up against his arm.

"Oh, nothing, Nishizawa-san. I was just thinking, that's all," he replied, then went back to spacing out and staring at the trees they walked by.

She lifted up her shoulders and gave a small sigh. _He's obviously thinking of something, but he won't tell me what! Come on, Fuyuki! Tell me already!_ "Um… you sure? You can tell me, if you want."

He smiled at her. "Thanks, Nishizawa-san. But it has nothing to do with occult, so… you probably wouldn't be interested."

"NONONONONO OF COURSE I'M INTERESTED!" she yelled. Fuyuki blinked back at her. She collected herself and smoothed her skirt. "I mean, haha, you can tell me anything!"

"Oh." He looked back in front of him. "Okay."

"So?"

"Huh? Oh, right." Fuyuki's face reddened a little, only causing Momoka to wonder all the more what he was thinking. "I dunno. I've just been thinking about the weirdest things lately. It's a bit e-embarrassing, actually."

"Really?" she asked. Her eyes flitted to the gate of Fuyuki's house. _Darn it, we're almost to his home. Better make this quick._

"Yeah. I've been coming up with these weird phenomenons for human emotions, like… everyone can't understand each other unless they retrace the other's steps… we only find things funny because they involve someone else's stupidity… people fall in love when they stare into each other's eyes…. You know, that kind of weird stuff." He began to open the gate.

Momoka beamed. "Um, what was the last one you said, Fuyuki-kun?"

"That… people fall in love when they stare into each other's eyes…?"

She folded her hands on one of the pillars of his fence and gazed at him. "Well? Do you think it's true?"

"Uh…?" _There's something odd about the way she said that…._ Fuyuki looked at her, confused. They accidentally locked eyes—or at least, from Fuyuki's side, it was accidental. He forced a swallow as he stared at her. He wanted to leave, but for some reason he just couldn't look away. _I've never realized how pretty those violet eyes of Nishizawa-san's are._

_Fuyuki-kun's staring at me!_ thought Momoka happily. _And he's not looking away! I never want this moment to end…. Ahhhhh…._ They continued staring into each other's eyes for a long time.

Fuyuki blushed, finally realizing what he had been doing for the last few minutes. He adjusted his school bag and darted behind the fence. "S-sorry, Nishizawa-san! I—I didn't mean to! S-see you tomorrow!" he called. The last Momoka saw of him was when he the front door swung shut behind him. She grit her teeth in rage.

Paul crawled out from behind the bushes. "Shall I get the limo, Lady Momoka?"

"Very well." She sighed in defeat. "I had him so close, I could just feel our hearts beating as one." She slumped against the pillar. "But then he had to leave so suddenly…!"

"Maybe another day, Lady Momoka. Boys of his age usually get embarrassed when doing such," Paul assured her.

Momoka gasped, placing a hand to her lips as she stepped into the limo. "Do you think Fuyuki-kun got embarrassed? Ohhh, that's so cute!" she gushed.

The limo took off and drove them back to the mansion. Momoka plopped down onto her bed, sighing in happiness now. Tamama bounced up to her.

"Watcha thinkin' about, Momotchi?" he asked in his adorably high-pitched voice. "Lemme guess. Is it Fukki again?"

Her face turned red. "How did you know?"

"Hmm… cuz that's what your always thinking about?" Tamama helped himself onto her bed.

She sat up. "I got Fuyuki-kun to stare at me! For such a long time, too. It was so cute; you should have seen it! He told me that people fall in love when they stare into each other's eyes, and then he did just that! …Well… maybe not the falling in love part, but… hey! How would I know? Maybe he did fall in love with me and is just too embarrassed to admit it! Ahhh…!" She cupped her face in her hands, fantasizing.

Tamama rolled his eyes. "You're such a lovesick teenager, Momotchi. Hey… wait… what did you say about people staring into each other's eyes and falling in love?"

"Oh, I don't know if it actually works or not. But it must! Fuyuki-kun told me himself. Plus, it's fun! It could definitely get you closer to the one you love. Just like I did. Mmmmm…" she told him.

"The one… I love?" he repeated, testing the words on his tongue. "So… if I stared into the Sergeant's eyes, he would fall in love with me?"

"Maybe." She winked at him. "You don't know until you try it, Tama-chan!"

That was enough to get him going. Immediately, Tamama took his hovercraft to the Hinata house. It crashed through the roof, but oh well. There was no time to worry about stuff like that. (Besides, it wasn't HIS house.) He dropped it in the hallway and darted down into the basement, where he came face-to-face with the door to his superior's room. He pushed it aside and saw Keroro on the ground, reading some manga. Tamama walked up to him; he was already panting heavily in excitement.

"SERGEANT…" he breathed. Keroro put down his manga and looked up to him confusedly. "LOOK INTO MY E—" He stopped himself just then. _No, I can't just say "look into my eyes." That would be too blunt! I must use an excuse._ "HAVE A STARING CONTEST WITH ME!"

"Um… why?" he asked.

"Because, ah…" Tamama fumbled.

"Oh, I get it." Keroro nodded, understanding. "You want to have a staring contest with me so we can test our stamina!"

"Um… yeah!" he said.

"Very well, then." Keroro waited for Tamama to sit before him. He stared into the Private's eyes, refusing to blink. Tamama stared back much more happily. His eyes were absorbed into the black orbs of his superior. Keroro stared harder. His eye twitched. _Crap, I knew this would be a bad idea. I… must… blink! We Keronians can't go very long without moisture…. But I can't lose to the Private! I can't let him think of me as a failure of a sergeant!_ He furrowed his brow. _Maybe if I focus on some parts of his face, I'll get distracted enough to not be able to blink._ He stared deeper into Tamama's eyes. _Wow, his eyes are really shiny_, he thought. Eventually Keroro gave in and blinked.

"Aw, man! I lost!" he groaned. "By the way, Private, you have some very pretty eyes, if I do say so myself."

Tamama beamed. "You think so?"

"Yes. Yes, I do," said Keroro. Satisfied, Tamama left the residence. Once he was gone, Keroro heard the familiar shouts of Natsumi coming from the house.

"STUPID FROG!" he heard. Keroro sighed and reluctantly went up to see what the problem was. He saw Natsumi staring at the hole in the roof, tapping her foot impatiently as she waited for his explanation. "Well? What have you got to say for yourself?"

"Ummmm… hi?" he said. Natsumi started cracking her knuckles. She raised her fist into the air when—

"Wait!"

They both turned to see Fuyuki, who had been walking past. "Sis, the Sarge didn't do anything! I just saw the Private leave through that hole!"

"Oh, so this is Tamama's fault!" she said.

"Urk!" Keroro pressed his hands against his cheeks. _Crap, I can't let the Private have the blame, even if he was the one at fault! After that staring contest… I feel different…._ "N-no, it was me…" he lied.

"Oh. Well, fix it soon or else," she ordered him. "Why was Tamama here, anyway?"

"Oh, he and I were just having a staring contest, that's all," Keroro told her. "He seemed pretty intent on it, actually. Don't know why."

Fuyuki gave a snort, then burst out giggling.

"What? What's so funny?" said Keroro.

"He—he must have heard it from Nishizawa-san! I told her earlier today that people fall in love by staring into each other's eyes. I don't know whether or not it was true, but—" His giggles cut himself off.

"Eh? People fall in love by staring into each other's eyes? I didn't know that!" said Natsumi.

"I don't get it, though. How'd you come to that conclusion just because I said the Private wanted to have a staring contest with me?" Keroro looked to Fuyuki, demanding an answer. Fuyuki only looked away and kept laughing. The angry frog left to his room.

"I swear, that Fuyuki-dono can be so irritating sometimes!" he huffed, beginning to snap some pieces off a plastic sheet to build a Gunpla. "Falling in love with someone when you look into their eyes? Pphft, lame. The only thing _I'm_ falling in love with… is my Gundam models!"

The door to his room swung open just then, and Angol Mois popped in. "Hello, Uncle!" she greeted.

"Oh, hello, Mois-dono! Here to sweep my room?"

"Like, yup!" said Mois. "But first…" She dropped to her knees. "…I'm going to have a _staring contest_ with you!"

"Gero? Not again!" he squeaked. "You must've heard Fuyuki-dono and me, didn't you?" he asked. She nodded. "Fine. And then you do my chores."

"Okay!" She opened up her eyes and began staring at him. Her eyes glistened so much, they seemed to emanate actual sparkles… and they did. Keroro calmly stared back at her and sucked his cheek. She smiled brightly at him. _I'm going to make Uncle fall in love with me! You could say, no one wants two-sided?_

Unfortunately, Angol Mois was the first one to blink. Her smile fell despairingly. "Ohh… like, a total loss?"

"Total loss indeed, Mois-dono," Keroro told her. His eyes drifted back to his Gunpla. "You have fun doing my chores now, okay? And I'll… just… be here and stuff."

"Yes, Uncle," she sighed, quickly regaining her smile. She stood up and started sweeping around Keroro's room.

* * *

The next day at school, Natsumi went up to Koyuki in excitement. "Koyuki-chan!" she said. "Did you know that people fall in love by staring into each other's eyes?"

"Really?" the ninja girl gasped. "I thought it was by sniffing each other! Who told you this strange custom?"

"My brother. He knows a lot about these sort of phenomenons." Natsumi gave her a half-smile. "Do you think it's true?"

"Let's find out with a staring contest!" said Koyuki. She narrowed her eyes at Natsumi, who stared back just as hard. She frowned, her eyes watering a bit. _With my ninja abilities, I will keep my eyes open long enough to make Natsumi-san fall in love with me!_

Natsumi blinked. "Whoops, I guess I lost," she laughed. "Come on, let's head on to school."

"Oh… okay," said Koyuki a bit sadly.

* * *

When Koyuki came home that day to her ninja hut, she was looking a bit down. Dororo took note in this behavior and decided that something was up.

"Is something the matter, Koyuki-dono?" he asked her.

"No, it's nothing," she said. "Hey, Dororo, do you think that people fall in love by staring into each other's eyes? Because it didn't exactly work for Natsumi-san and me…. She didn't seem to like me any more than a friend at all…."

"Really?" said Dororo, cocking his head to the side. Koyuki tried to resist the urge to look at him, but reminded herself that it _didn't_ actually work. She let herself look into his eyes. They were very… blue.

"My god, you have no pupils," she realized. "That's just weird."

But despite this, she continued staring at him. He just stared back, as a silence they were both comfortable with rolled by.

_Koyuki-dono's eyes are so beautiful. The color reminds me of the forest she found me in,_ thought Dororo.

But what she was thinking was, _Dororo still has no pupils! How does he see? His eyes are so… light. Like the sky when the sun's out._

Dororo blushed and looked away. He cleared his throat but said nothing.

"Er… sorry," she said.

"No need to apologize, Koyuki-dono," Dororo quietly assured her. She turned away from him and pressed her index fingers together, squeezing her eyes shut in awkwardness.

* * *

Natsumi looked to the cobalt sky and breathed in through her nose. It was starting to get dark. She caught the familiar whiff of sweet potatoes roasting and pushed aside the glass door to confirm her suspicions. Sure enough, there they were, above the flickering bonfire that the Corporal was calmly stoking.

"Hey, Giroro!" she shouted. Giroro dropped his stick into the fire, startled. _If I didn't know any better, I would think I just caught him off-guard,_ she thought. "Heh. Silly soldier, letting me scare you like that," she teased.

"Erm, you didn't actually scare me… so much as surprise me…" he told her gruffly. She took a seat by him on one of the cinderblocks. "…Trust me, if it had been anyone else, I would have been fine…."

"Oh? Why is that?" she asked. Giroro twitched again, as if he didn't expect her to ask anything. He started sweating nervously.

"O-oops. D-did I say that out loud…?" he muttered. He yanked one of the sticks out of the ground and took a sweet potato off of it. He handed it to her, no words said.

"Thanks," she told him. Giroro blushed. She bit into the leather of the sweet potato, feeling as if something was awry. She glanced at Giroro to see him immediately look away. _Had he been staring at me or something?_ she wondered. _Maybe there's something on my face…?_

This cycle continued for longer than Natsumi felt comfortable with. She swallowed her last bit of sweet potato and furrowed her brow. "All right, space toad. Very funny. What's up? You keep staring at me then looking away."

As she said this, Giroro's face exploded in a bright pink. "Uh—it's, ah, um… nothing!" he sputtered.

She cocked an eyebrow. "Seriously, though. What do you want?"

He turned the other direction and muttered something which she brought out to be, "H-have a staring contest with me…."

"A… staring contest?" she asked. It took her a moment to process the words, and then she broke out into laughter. "I get it! You heard something from the stupid frog, didn't you?"

To this, he was only silent.

"Well, whatever he said, it's not true."

Giroro looked down, seemingly disappointed.

"But," she continued, "we could have a staring contest anyway! After all, Fuyuki said it helps people fall in love!"

He perked back up. "R-Really? You'll do it with me?"

"Yeah! So I can practice for Saburo-senpai!"

Giroro slumped in despair. "Oh. Um…."

"Well? Come on!" Natsumi grabbed both of Giroro's arms (much to his surprise) and forced him to face her. She stared him down hard, and he stared right back at her. Just… more… in shock. She narrowed her eyes at him, determined to prevail.

_Must—look—away!_ thought Giroro. _N-Natsumi! She's staring at me! Actually paying attention to me! I—I can't take it, I…._ His face began to heat up. But even still, he couldn't take his eyes off hers. _How could I ever refuse to look at something so beautiful?_

He couldn't, and he knew it. Ironically, Natsumi was having her own thoughts about Giroro's eyes. Something about them just… entranced her. Normally someone would've found such eyes like his intimidating, but to her, they just looked… so… kind. And his eyes had just the slightest hint of blue in them. _I never realized his eyes were blue before,_ thought Natsumi. Caught up in her thoughts, she let her eyelids drop.

She paused a moment, not quite registering what she'd done. "Awwww, dangit!" she groaned. "You win this time, Giroro. But I'll beat you someday, I swear it!" She paused. "G-Giroro?"

The alien she once knew as "Giroro" was no longer of this world, but instead a lovesick mess, caught in some fantasy, and refusing to tear his eyes away from Natsumi's. She looked to either side of her, a bit uncomfortable, and then slowly backed away into the house.

"Weirdo," she muttered.

* * *

"Ku ku ku. Interesting."

Sergeant Major Kululu examined the images brought up on his various monitors. They replayed the scenes of Fuyuki and Momoka, Keroro and Tamama, Keroro and Angol Mois, Koyuki and Natsumi, Koyuki and Dororo, and Giroro and Natsumi. He focused his eyes on one of them in particular.

"Tch. Thinks he can just do whatever he wants, can he?" he said to himself, clicking his mouse to close the monitor. "As for you, mister… ku ku ku… interesting theory. Staring into each other's eyes makes people fall in love, does it?" He closed Fuyuki's monitor and leaned back in his chair. "Complete bullsh**."

_And still…_ His eyes drifted to Giroro's monitor. _…might as well take advantage of this opportunity and have a little fun. Ku ku ku._

* * *

Giroro sadly watched Natsumi leave back into the house. They had gotten so close, and then she had left just as quickly. He sighed. Maybe some other time.

His ears perked back up as the door opened once more. Maybe she was coming back! Wait… no…. His hopes sank as Kululu came into view. _What a downer,_ thought Giroro.

"What do YOU want, Kululu?" he spat, returning his eyes to the fire. Kululu walked up next to him, a little too close for comfort.

"What everyone wants, of course! Ku ku ku. Have a staring contest with me, Senpai!"

Giroro rolled his eyes. "That's not possible."

"Ku ku ku. Oh? Why not?"

"Because you wear glasses, moron. I can't see your eyes. Obviously you would cheat."

To this, Kululu was silent. He inwardly smacked himself. _Damn it, that old man's right! How could I not have seen this before? I wear glasses! He can't SEE my eyes! Ku ku ku. Hm. Should have planned this out._

"In that case, I'll be right back," said Kululu. He came back a little while later with contacts in, making his eyes appear jet-black (opposed to their usual green. But Giroro didn't know this).

"Senpai, I will make you fall in love with me through this staring contest!" he declared.

Giroro grunted. "I bet you can't last a minute without blinking."

They began staring at each other. Giroro stared him down long and hard, to which Kululu blushed ever-so-embarrassedly.

_Ku ku ku. See? Bullsh**. I'm staring at him and I feel no different,_ he thought.

Giroro tried not to laugh. _Peh. He's blinking and he doesn't even know it._

"Ku? Why are you walking away, Corporal, dear?" asked Kululu.

"I've clearly won this match, Kululu. And please—" He waved his hand indifferently over his shoulder and sat back down on his cinderblock. "—DON'T call me 'dear.' "

"But it describes you so much!" said Kululu. He received only Giroro's usual silent treatment.

Beaten, the yellow creeper trudged back to his lab, switching out the contacts with his glasses on the way there. _Petty Corporal. He doesn't know the first thing about romance. Nor does he know when it's time to love~ me. Ku ku ku._ He put his hand up to his mouth and opened the lab door. _Guess I'll make some curry or something. Ku ku ku. And have a staring contest with IT._ He laughed at this thought, because it was almost too true. But when he had stepped into the lab, he saw no curry, but instead…

"…Mois?" he said. "Why are you in here suddenly? I thought you were doing the Captain's chores." He gave a chuckle. "No, wait, let me rephrase that. _How_ did you get here? You _were_ doing the Captain's chores."

"I teleported!" she said mystically.

_Why am I not surprised?_ he wondered, taking a seat in his office chair. _It's not the first time, either…._

"Um… did you… have fun… staring creepily at the Captain?" he asked in an attempt to make small-talk. There was really nothing better to do at the moment.

"Like, yup!" She frowned. "But Fukki's advice didn't work. Uncle didn't fall in love with me! You could say, worthless tips?"

"Ku ku ku. You could say that indeed."

"Hey, Kululu-san." Mois plopped down into an office-chair and slowly spun herself in it. "Do _you_ think it works? Like, falling in love when you look into someone's eyes?"

"No. That would be stupid. Ku ku ku," he said to her, trying to ignore the girl to the best of his abilities. There was only silence that came. He paused. Mois had stopped talking.

_Ku ku ku. Guess it's the best for everyone,_ he told himself. Kululu twitched. He felt as if there was some unwelcome presence looming over his shoulder.

"Watcha doin'?" came her voice from above him.

Kululu's whole body jerked away from her. "H-how did you…?"

"How did I what?" she asked, gazing into his eyes curiously. He started trembling. "Kululu-san? Why are you shaking?"

"Ku ku ku. It's nothing. J-just… go back to… whatever you were doing… or something," he told her angrily.

Angol Mois leaned closer to him, only making their eyes all the more closer together. "What was I doing? I forgot."

"Y-you were… s-something. C-can you please stop that?" he begged.

"Stop what?" Her face came even closer. Kululu tried desperately to cover his eyes with his hands, but alas. They were too tiny. The sparkles were already starting to come for him. His glasses cracked in horror.

"Kululu-san." Angol Mois frowned at him. "You're not supposed to break those!"

"A-and why not?" he challenged. _Just don't look… don't look and it'll all be okay…. She's evil and trying to cause you pain, just don't fall for it; you're much stronger than this, Kululu. Get a grip on yourself…!_ he muttered in his head.

"Because," she told him.

Kululu never heard the rest of her sentence. In fact, it seemed that she wasn't there anymore at all. The sparkles had also vanished. _Phew,_ he breathed. But something didn't feel right…. Everything looked awfully fuzzy and blurry….

His hands went up to his face, feeling around. _Damn that girl,_ he cursed. The only thing he could make out was the back of her leg as she fled the lab in glee. _She stole my glasses!_

* * *

And a little while later….

"Uncle! I'm back to do your chores!" called Angol Mois.

Keroro put down his Gunpla and looked up at her. "Ah, Mois-dono! What an… interesting new look you have. When did you get glasses?"

"You know," she said, "Fukki was right about staring at things. The minute I laid my eyes on them, I just knew that I had fallen in love with this pair of glasses."

He stared back at her in silence.

Simply silence.

* * *

**The image of Angol Mois wearing Kululu's glasses…. Hmm….**

**Sorry! I've been in a KuluMois mood this month. It's not something I can help.**


End file.
